"HAND IN GLOVE"

So, let's see, where were we? Ah, Saturday, I think. Yes. Well, I'd gotten an email from Elizabeth Ellen asking me to come to her reading at Quimby's on Saturday night, which I did. How could I not with a sweet personal invite, right? She shared the stage with Myriam Gurba and the two made a well-paired reading duo with their somewhat thematically similar reading selections, in the greater woman-finds-herself-by-stepping-outside-of-things sense. So very glad I went.

After, I had to scurry away to a birthday hoe-down for Jerkface, who I hadn't seen in forever, which was lovely and complete with all the trimmings of a good soiree-- a decent glass of wine, veg sushi, good conversation. I did stand in line for the ladies room as three young women chatted about how many men in the room they'd shagged, and found it rather funny that they agreed that at least four were horrible. Unforch.

The rest of the weekend and today I just did my thing. Tonight, I'm working still, but with a slow-ish week ahead of me, I am setting out to finish a manuscript, or come damn close. It's all I want to focus on this week, writing-wise. That's it.

Tomorrow my cat is three years old. He's getting his favorite organic catfood, a new squeaky mouse, catnip, and a few extra rounds of mouse-on-a-fishingpole. My parenting skills are top-notch, right? Poor cat, I smother him to bits and yet he tolerates me and my antics.

Also.

I wish the whole world was wireless. And, that I had a couch outside and a hot tub inside.

That's about it for now.

"I WAS HAPPY TO STAY"

Well, Einstein had a fun night.


The reading went wonderfully! Tim Walker read beforehand, and I was immediately struck by how similarly he and I write about the world and details around us. We talked about this a bit later, but I am getting ahead of myself.


Walker started, I finished, our work read well together. Neil (of diner fame-- see previous post) brought incredible food, so many people showed up (many of whom I'd met around town in the day leading up to the reading), people bought books, people laughed and seemed to be into things. It was perfect. I'm so happy.



I'd read here again anytime they'd have me. I really like the good, creative energy in the Arcadia Project building (the record store/coffeehouse/gallery space, etc.).

Anyway... after, we stopped by LopLop, for a quick sip (I love this bar) then I hit the hay while the crew hung out on the roof of the AP playing guitars and singing until the storm blew through in the middle of the night.

Overheard in Canada:

"Jeez, that jacket is so Paula Poundstone, eh?"

"Naw, they were doing, like, Slayeroke. It was all only Slayer songs! Anyway, I sang Rain and Blood, yeah."

"I'm not gonna say we broke up because she loves The Eagles, but, uh... yeah I think we broke up because she loves The Eagles."

"So there I was in Vancouver, right?, and I walk up to this CityWorks truck and there's this big burly guy, a worker, in the truck, and he's fucken listening to Material Girl so loud."

"Man, fuck that zoo. That's not even a zoo! They've got like two goats and a wolf!"

"IF YOU HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO SPARE"

"I WILL SEE YOU IN FAR OFF PLACES"

So, it's 4:30am-ish, and I think I'm about set for Canada. Bag packed, apartment clean, passport set out where I can't forget it, yadda yadda. It'll be a fun time. Had a good weekend, and would again like to present a single-sentence stream-of-consciousness bit summing up my weekend:

errand, errand, Serbian laundry freakout, store's closed, brainstorm, can't cook I'll melt, Live Earth, fuckyouRichieSambora, timeline, 3 months, 5 months, Dukes of Hazard, passport, passport?, passport, passport?!?, passport, iddly-wonky, calm, okay, good, sleep, sleep, sleep, cat, wake, stupid Flanders cat, sleep, grapes, pack, can't cook I'll melt, must cook I'll wither, cooking leftovers, stupid rice, water, tea, melting, back to AC, melting, hot feet, meowy cat, restaurant reviews, eyeroll, sleep or nap or something, 3am get in gear

Now that I'm up, I think I want to sleep more. Oh, decisions. Sleep a little more and have to wait and hang out and get a late start to avoid Chicago rush hour, or suck it up and leave in the next two hours before rush hours starts. Hmm. Knowing me, I'll suck it up, but we shall see. (Update: I dicked around my apartment for so long trying to get it all together before sleeping a little more, that I think I need to suck it up and get going.)

Anyway. I'll blog from my travels, as per usual. I haven't been to Canada in a long time, so I'm excited to go again. Last time I was there, I went to Montreal and Quebec City, two other places I really love.

Remember, my dear Canadian (and Canadian border-near) readers, here is the scoop on my reading in Sault St. Marie. C'mon out, or send folks in your place. You know I like butts in seats for the readings. Er, I mean, an audience of smiling faces.

And... while I'm heading that direction, you can show a little love, if you like, to my hosts Uppercase Books and good ol' Bacon Bits and Midget Parts' Al Bjornaa. (Ohh, and check out a little blurb about them here).

"FOUND FOUND FOUND"

You guys, this website is so fun. It's called GoodReads, and while I have indeed mentioned it before, I don't think I realized how super-cool it is until I started playing around with it a bit last night. Go sign yourself up. It's very cool.

Then, you can friend request me right here. Pretty please.

So, show of hands, who is coming to my reading in Canada on Tuesday?

"I WAS HAPPY TO STAY"

Boy, oh boy do I have a lot to tell you guys. To begin, last night was so much fun! Unfortunately, Emerson Dameron was under the weather, and so rescheduled until next month. But, Jonathan Messinger was so very funny with his piece about liquid-filled mousepads, Neo-futurist founder, Greg Allen was a riot with his piece about a the nature of circles and orbs and lines, and as for me and my piece about fratboys... well, I have an innate inability to hear laugher while trying to create it, so I think my piece about fratboys did just fine, itself. Wait, here, I'll let you read it. S'okay. Gahead. Granted, you'll have to just imagine that I'm reading it poetry-slam style and you'll have to just image that I'm doing the voices of the valley girl receptionist, the drill sgt., and the fratboys, but I'm sure you can manage.

My favorite part, I must admit, was Abraham Levitan of Baby Teeth as the house band. He sat and took notes during each of our pieces and performed hilarious, beautiful, impromptu songs about each. I howled! So funny!

Let's see, post show, I chatted with darling Irish Ho and the wonderful Elizabeth Crane for a bit, made a few new friends including--- this is my favorite!-- a very wonderful writerly lady named Laura who told me she printed out my website pic long ago and gave it to her hairstylist for inspiration! Are you loving that as much as I am? Finally, years of hacking my own mop has paid off!

Then, I chatted more with Jonathan Messinger, Scott Stealey and had the pleasure of meeting Patrick Somerville, the fellow who was in the Chicago Reader's Fall Books issue with me last November... remember? Yes, him. So funny. All in all, it was a lovely night.

Pa Guth sent me a text message at 1am from an out-of-the-country airport as he made his way to his destination. Can't say I have ever gotten a text message from my Dad at that hour, so the timestamp made me laugh while I was having a little post-show bite with Irish Ho. It was prom night in Chicago last night, so we sat in a diner and admired the sparkled dresses and complicated hairstyles and laughed as we reminisced about our own prom nights years ago.

I think that's about it. Oh! I met my new neighbor for a sec. Remember how I hoped for a cool neighbor? Well, I only met her for a minute yesterday, but I think she carried a Nightmare Before Xmas bag. Clearly she is cool. I'm glad. Of course, I gave her my card yesterday, which lists this blog, so she is probably reading this and going, What the fuck? I'm not even here a day and this nut is blogging about me? Hells no. So it goes.

"STOP ME IF YOU THINK THAT YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE"

Morrissey was wonderful, as always. He did a delightfully weird yoga bridge pose dance, he whipped the mic cord, he ripped off his shirt, he sang his little heart out, he smiled graciously to all parties involved when a burgundy shirt-clad fellow hopped up on stage and got pounced on by security, he sang all the songs I hoped he would, he generally, fucking rocked.

I gave business cards to the two men sitting in front of me, as I was able to see them both sneaking fantastic photos the whole show. I gave an honest plea for an emailed photo or two. If they email, I'll share if it's okay with them. Let's hope. C'mon, guys. I'll blog about your band/book/office/whatever and send you as many customers/sales as I can. Pleasepleaseplease. Hook a Morrissey-lovin' sister up.

Anyway, the show was wonderful. He played "You're Gonna Need Someone On Your Side", which I was thrilled to hear. I, yet again, nearly cried during "Everyday Is Like Sunday".

I'm only in Indy for the night, then I'm heading back to Chicago in the morning and hitting the ground running with a very busy day. If you're nearby, come say hello on Tuesday night as I read from Three Fallen Women at The Fixx with Timothy Schaffert as he reads from his new release, Devils In The Sugar Shop at 7:30pm.

"OSCILLATE WILDLY"

Last night, I went to a store I adore, The Book Cellar for a very different kind of author reading. Though she did read from her book, Alpana Singh (Alpana Pours) also served as sommelier of the event, pairing wine with books. This, as you can imagine, is right up my alley. Her book is wonderful, especially the section she read about pairing wines with rice cakes and Chee-toes. As someone who has long been pairing wine with Spaghettios and Taco Bell when the occasions arise, I knew this book would find a special place in my heart immediately.

I, of course, wanted to make an attempt to convincing Singh to do a vegetarian (good) or vegetarian writers (better) edition of her television show, Check, Please!, but, in the end, I thought this might seem a little creepy for a strange woman to suddenly be in her face pitching her ideas, so I passed.

The writers behind the books paired with wine were the books of Wendy McClure (I'm Not The New Me and The Amazing Mackerel Pudding Plan: Classic Diet Recipe Cards from the 1970s, who also shared a hilariously funny short story with us about a pet fish, and the wonderful friend friend I made in Omaha last year, Jami Attenberg (Instant Love), who also read a bit from her new novel (can't wait!).

I was pleased, also, to see another friend I met in Omaha, Michael Barnes who is so incredibly talented and such fun to be around. So, with many familiar, smiling faces, BFFs, partners-in-crime and old friends in tow, we all headed out and about for (more) wine. The brain behind the bookstore joined up later (and we had a spectacular conversation about marathon adventures), I met a hilarious copywriter (who reminded me of a best friend in third grade) and it was, all in all, a lovely night.

Of course, I'll ask what I always ask: Get these wonderful books, tell other people if you enjoyed them, then add them to your LibraryThing and Shelfari pages. Better yet, go to their readings when they're in your neck of the woods next.

Today I'm paying a visit to Mermaid Head to see her mama-to-be belly and give her a big hug, then it's off to dinner (and probably even more wine) with Irish Ho to celebrate her birthday. Tomorrow V. is here for the day. Monday I have dinner plans in Memphis. Wednesday I have a reading in Austin. Bonk! Boom! Pow! Woot!

"ASSEMBLE THE WAYS"

Hello, hello! Plenty to discuss today. First, another piece of news I've had to keep quiet is now yours to know. I am reading with one of my very favorite people. It doesn't get much better.

May 22nd
Amy Guth and Timothy Schaffert Reading
The Fixx Coffee Bar, 7:30 pm on
3053 N. Sheffield Ave. in Chicago

This is that awesome little coffee bar right by the Vic Theater. Know it and love it. The place is great, the owners are great. You'll never want to set foot in a Starbucks again. This reading, ladies and gentlemen, is going to be great. You'll love Timmy and his writing so, so, so much.

Next item on the agenda is a shameless vanterie sans scruple. I have another piece up over on Six Sentences today called "At Sevens". Feel free. I'll wait here while you check it out.


Thanks!

So, last night, a relative I haven't seen in yeeeeears was in town, so we got together for dinner and caught up, which was a lovely time. After, a series of evens led me to be reminded how easily threatened I am when it comes to feeling vulnerable or weak. When did I turn into a fratboy? Feel vulnerable and act out? Great plan, Ames, great plan. It really accomplishes little but making me look neurotic instead of vulnerable, then feeling as if I must explain myself, which only leads to vulnerability anyway. Oy.

Anyway.

I'm working today on odds and ends today and getting ready to take off to Austin on Monday. Must go to the post office. Must. No fooling around. Oy.

"READER MEET AUTHOR"

Now that was a great reading! I just love The Book Cellar so much.


Seriously, what a good time tonight. It was very casual and low-key and just plain fun. And what a supportive bookstore and audience, really. You feel that sort of thing, you really do. You know when the bookstore staff is behind you, you know when your audience is behind you. You just do. And tonight, they were and it was wonderful.

We were kickin' it alphabetically, so I was first up.



I read the opening strings section and the Carmen overdose/explanation of rain's function section, which I enjoy reading, but especially enjoyed tonight, as it was raining like mad as I read.

Then, Rick Karlin read from his book Show Biz Kids...


...as I sat on the front row howling with laughter because not only is the book funny, but he's funny, and the combination was perfect. (Seriously, this book is so funny. I bought it immediately after and got him to sign my copy. So excited to read this.)

Then, Elaine Soloway read from her beautiful and touching Division Street Princess. I tried to be discreet, but I sat there with welled-up eyes the entire time she read. I love this book so much. So much, in fact, that even though I have already read it, I bought a second copy because I wanted her to autograph it for me.



So many people came out, too! Leah was there. Irish Ho was there with my new (but good) friend, artist Andrej "It smells like Europe, so I buy it" Didenko (I have one of his beautiful paintings right in front of me as I type this) and his partner, John. Sparkypoo was there (a big thanks to her for taking pics tonight!), with Princess Speedy and Xegbd. And, to my complete surprise and delight, Therapy Doc was there! And that only covers who I knew! I met so many fun folks who were good enough to come out in the crummy weather. So nice. So nice.

I stopped for a feta-hummus-sprouts-tomato-olive-balsamic pita and a margarita and bobbed my head to a little Joy Division as I nibbled. And, now, at long last, I am home with one very snuggly kitty and ready to for bed.



But, before I turn in, I have a favor to ask. I know this fella who had surgery today and his Ma is worried to bits about him. So, just for a sec, everyone shoot a happy, healthy thought towards southern California. Thanks.

"GOLDEN LIGHTS"

Tonight I'm reading at:

The Book Cellar 7pm
(with Elaine Soloway and Rick Karlin)
4736-38 N. Lincoln Ave.
Chicago, IL

C'mon out, yo!

"HOW SOON IS NOW?"

So, last night was a hill of fun. Unfortunately, Binnie Kirschenbaum had to cancel at the last minute (Binneleh! You okay?) so Joanna Scott and I ruled the roost. She read from her very lovely book, Everybody Loves Somebody (and signed a wonderful inscription that I just adore into the copy I purchased), which you should run right out and acquire from your nearest independent bookstore.

Man-about-blogosphere, John K, was kind enough to document the whole shebang for us last night. So, let's do a little show and tell, eh?

These first two. Yes. Here I am (with my two hour old haircut. Yes? We like?) getting the giggles started by sharing a few freaky emails I've gotten lately from random readers. So funny. Always great for a giggle.



Then, I read a little of my Three Fallen Women.



Then, Joanna Scott did her fabulous reading (the story about "Yip!" is precious. I can't wait to read it again) and when she finished, we both hopped up and did a little Q&A. Okay, I forced the poor audience to cough up some questions for us to get chatty over. What did you do on Thursday night? Ahem, I was hanging out with a Pulitzer gal. That's how I roll, thankyouverymuch. Behold!




Unfortunately, I didn't end up with any photos of the lovely and fun Bookslut, but a big thank you to her and to all of my fine new friends at Stop Smiling magazine for putting it all together and inviting this Bigmouth to come hang out and play. Many, many thanks.

(I got the coolest thing last night from a new friend who calls himself "Evil Goy". Hello, vintage 1976 Siouxie and the Banshees t-shirt! Evil Goy, many thanks to you.)

"IN BETWEEN DAYS"

How do we feel about this? Look how cute they are.



Aw. Anyhoot. Last night was spectacular. Details on it in a bit. I got a lot of pics from last night that I want to share, so give me a little time to sort through them, then I'll give you pics and a full recap.

"GOLDEN LIGHTS, DISPLAYING YOUR NAME"

Just a little business to deal with first:

I hope to see your smiling face at a reading this month. You know butts in seats make me glad, after all.

THIS THURSDAY, March 8th:
Bookslut Reading Series 7:30pm
(with Joanna Scott and Binnie Kirschenbaum)
Stop Smiling Storefront
1371 North Milwaukee Ave.
Chicago, IL

March 21st:
The Book Cellar 7pm
(with my BFF Elaine Soloway and Rick Karlin)
4736-38 N. Lincoln Ave.
Chicago, IL

March 28th-April 1st:
New Orleans/Tennessee Williams Literary Festival
New Orleans, LA
*I'll be speaking on a panel, "Orpheus Ascending: First Books, New Voices" with Jennifer Paddock, John Pritchard, and Sidney Thompson on Saturday 3/31 at 10am, will be giving at reading on 4/1, and will moderate the "Writing Outside the Box: Outrageous Fiction" panel featuring Ace Atkins, John Pritchard, and Sydney Thompson.

Great, now that we have that worked out, I have absolutely nothing to update you about. I worked, I read, I slept, I ate, I played hide and seek with Yiddishe Katze, I went to the museum and geeked about the Gregor Mendel mess, cleaned a little, lined up the next round of projects, ya ya ya.

Anyway, who's coming out to a reading this month, eh? You know, at one of my readings, a couple hooked up and is still living living happily ever after. I'm just saying. You might meet your future Pooh-Bear, or a new BFF. C'mon. Wouldn't hurt to get out a little.