Apr 11, 2007

"WILLIAM, IT WAS REALLY NOTHING"

I'm such a clutz sometimes. This morning, in amazement that I was seeing such a huge dump of snow in mid-April, I fell over my cat, then, being flustered, went to take the trash out and forgot to disarm my alarm and scared the shit out of my neighbors when I opened my backdoor and set it (the security alarm) off, and so early. Good morning! WHOOP! WHOOP! WHOOP! It's seven am! Everyone up! WHOOP! WHOOP! WHOOP! Everyone look outside and see your goofy neighbor shrugging and waving meekly! WHOOP! WHOOP! Well, I guess I can take some solace in knowing I have neighbors who bother to look. That's a plus. Anyway, then I whacked my knee on the end table. Bang! Pow! Boom!

Anyway, I have a few little items to discuss.

The first item is that I have been invited to create an artistic rendidtion of my own arsehole (in honor of Kurt Vonnegut's depiction of his arsehole) with some terribly respectable authors, over on Spitzy's blogsite. I have many, may ideas of how I might do such a thing. I'll be doing this over the next several days, so I'll let you know how it goes. Clearly, this art must contain song lyrics. That's all I know. I have several ideas floating around... I wonder if he would accept a short arsehole series?

Secondly, I have a new piece going up on Six Sentences on May 2nd. I'll remind you. Fret not. I know you were frantic, trying to get your paper calendar and Blackberry to set reminders. I know. Shh. I'll take care of it.

And, I want to start doing a little every-other-week feature thing. I'm going to snatch up a writer, ask three very important questions of him/her and post it up. We'll all make new friends, expand our literary horizons, have fun pimping other writers' words, etc. It'll be fun. Want in on it? Just email me and we'll sort out the details, then I'll slap up the post. Voila. Super fun. No fuss.

Lastly, if you have thrown in a submission for my top secret little group fiction project, I'm nearly through all bazillion (yes, really a bazillion) submissions and will have my proverbial shit together on that shortly. Thank you all for your pateince when I got about seven or eight times more submissions than I planned to. Show on road shortly.

Anyway, I am staring at an important birthday square in the face today (a few days away still), and thinking a lot, and rather excitedly, about my life, and what a great adventure it has been thus far. Some of it has been stressful, most of it has been remarkably great, but it's all shaped me and made me who I am this minute. This second. Right now.

And, I can dig that.

3 comments:

Sizzle said...

totally dig it.

;)

Eric Spitznagel said...

I cannot wait to see your arsehole.

There is no way of saying that without sounding absolutely filthy.

Sorry.

Seriously, fellow FOAGies, I've heard some of Amy's ideas for her a-hole self-portrait, and it promises to be... how can I put this?... on the vanguard of the sphincter art movement.

Or did I just blow your mind?

diane said...

Wow, I just read the news about Vonnegut passing, and suddenly Spitznagel's project seems almost like a tribute. Wild.
Could you have song lyrics coming out of your arse? Just a thought...