Apr 30, 2007

"OUIJA BOARD, OUIJA BOARD"



Which one of you düshes enrolled me in the Omaha Steaks preferred customer program?

Whatevah. Düsh. Anyway.

Today, I learned that a favorite bodega of mine is now offering a new "high-energy" cup of brewed coffee with extra caffeine and "herbal energy boosters". Bleh. Something is terribly wrong with us if a regular cup of coffee isn't cutting it anymore. I mean, is there that much pressure on us to speed through the day? May I suggest more sleep and meals at regular intervals? You know what I'm saying?

I also learned today that red high heels are the new Ugg boots. I. Am. Devastated. I saw hoardes of Trixies today with shiny, red high heels on their feet. Some even with rolled jeans, too! Damnit. I love red shoes. Love them. I can't... you know, I mean, then I'll look like, you know one of them. I'm no Trixie. I am hoping this blows over quickly. I can't handle anything Rockabilly-ish being co-opted by the Trixies. Some things they're just going to have to leave to us tattooey ladies.

I mean, really.

5 comments:

Katie Schwartz said...

oh girl, out here, it's the peak-a-boo red heel. I've stored my red shoes away. not that I ever wear them, I just love red shoes.

omaha steaks program? that's so funny. (junior high flashback) as if

Anonymous said...

I will murder them with my red high heels that are rightfully mine.

John Kuttenberg said...

Ok, it help the middle aged fart time.

When you use the term "Trixies" do one of the two following definitions describe what you are talking about or do you have another?:

1) Lincoln Park Trixie Society definition:

Trixies are typically depicted as "social climbing, marriage-minded, money-hungry young ladies that seem to flock to the upwardly-mobile neighborhood of Lincoln Park."[1] Another description calls them "the women with Kate Spade bags for every day of the week; the ex-sorority girls still lusting after big, dumb jocks; the women who go to law school to find husbands.

or

2) The National Geograpics Definition:

this stereotype describes a "blond, late-twenties woman with a ponytail who works in PR or marketing, drives a black Jetta, gets manicures and no-foam skim lattes."

Amy Guth said...

Pretty much both, Wings. You've got it.

Pretty Pink Ink said...

my Trixie was a bed climbing, blanket hogging, treat-minded dashhund ... sorta fits